


Ache

by confusedkayt



Series: Hannibal Advent 2015 [1]
Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Episode: s01e01 Apéritif, Gen, Hannibal Advent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-17
Updated: 2015-11-17
Packaged: 2018-05-02 01:35:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5228912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/confusedkayt/pseuds/confusedkayt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alana takes a minute to re-ground herself after Jack so rudely interrupts the lecture she's agreed to cover for Will.</p>
<p>Written for Hannibal Advent 2015 day 1, Apéritif, prompt #1, "Ache"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ache

She would have thought it would cut the chatter. Yanked out of lecture mid-sentence by Jack Crawford himself, a good reminder that Alanna’s not some kind of kindly substitute to be half-listened to while the real deal is out in the field. It would help if Jack didn’t audibly ask for the real deal in question. Now she’s left with a hall full of whispers and the telltale lap-staring of surreptitious texting.

Nobody’s bold enough to come out and ask. A couple _are_ bold enough to look her up and down. Always a couple here at Quantico. If they’re going to keep doing this - and they are, Jack’s aura of faint, defiant guilt was proof enough that he’ll keep throwing Will Graham in front of every case he can, and damn the consequences - then they’re going to have to give her a locker. Bad enough that she’s not Will Graham. They won’t mind her at all when she’s dressed to comfort patients, not to project authority. Not that it’ll do much, not in this place. Toxic masculinity central. It’s textbook, always has been.

A strange environment, for a man like Will Graham. Oh, she can see how he got from here to there, and it makes her heart hurt. The way he is, the way he’d been raised, poor and southern and mostly by his dad - no wonder he ran straight for the only helping profession still firmly coded as masculine. In another, kinder life, maybe he would have spent his days with kindergarten kids. Social work. Nah. The toll that would take would be almost as high as his work as a profiler. Suffering is not so very different from violence. Hard enough on her, some days.

Harder on Will, not that she’s got any more time to dwell on it. They’re rustling around, now. They think she’ll let them out early. Fat chance. She’ll take time to hurt for him later. Right now, she’ll settle for standing in his shoes.

**Author's Note:**

> This little thing was inspired by a) my memories of the Harris books, which made no bones about the awkward atmosphere the FBI could create for take-no-prisoners women like Clarice and Ardelia Mapp and b) the frankly-icky experience I had at Quantico when I got to go for a one-day training there as a young college student, and spent much of my time trying to keep a poker face while passers-by gave me elevator eyes.
> 
> Alana! She's such a great character. I love her strength and her kindness, and the way she selects clothes as signal and armor for different occasions (and very likely different body issues) throughout the series. I was really struck by her decision to wear very fitted, very feminine dresses even into the BHCI. When I did prison visits, they were very clear that skirts were a no-no, even as part of a suit. Pants and jackets all the way. Alana is having none of it, and no one dares to tell her otherwise. Gosh, I love her. I personally put a lot of thought into the politics of very in-your-face feminine modes of presentation in spaces where that is not welcome (it's something I indulge in myself), and I love thinking about someone as thoughtful and plugged into others as Alana being very aware of how she's dressing herself and why and to what effect. I wonder if she and Hannibal have ever talked about it, or if they just have a little silent fellowship of Psychiatrists Who Dress Very Performatively.


End file.
